Why are some people loved more than others?

People's desire to be accepted in society is increasing, just do a quick Google search for “How to get others to love” and you will find more than millions of results, with many suggestions and ideas. Tips on how to please others.

For the most part, we rarely stop to consider why we like someone, what they did, and why someone likes or dislikes us.

Some of us ignore our inner "vibes" and often find things in common with others, for example some people may find similarities in music taste or the same constellation. But in reality, there's no right or wrong way to feel connected to someone, and science has stepped in to test this as well.

According to decades of research, people have concerns and concerns about becoming famous in their communities. And as many studies show, there are a lot of evolutionary (emotional) factors involved in whether we find a person likable or not. Below, we share some of the main ways people attract — or discourage — contact.

The Pratfall Effect

The Pratfall effect really goes against anything you were taught in school. Not only does it suggest that people who make mistakes are more likely to be perceived as likable, but it also implies that people perceived as "perfect" and "flawless" may not be accepted.

This finding comes from a study conducted by social psychologist Elliot Aronson in the 1960s, which recorded a group of people answering trivia questions. People who made mistakes or fell (e.g. spilling coffee on them) were rated relatively more likable than those who didn't.

And this makes sense when Brené Brown encourages fragility to be exposed, because daring to admit mistakes is also considered brave. It is this that helps you to touch others more, which is probably why it is considered such a valuable quality. In addition, admitting shortcomings is also a proof of one's honesty, it easily wins the trust of the opposite person.

This theory is widely applied in life, especially in Korean films about the main character who often makes many mistakes but is very cute. However, beware of this effect, honestly admit your shortcomings instead of making yourself a victim or fool, other people will find you more pitiful than likable and you don't want that. right?

Similarities

A basic tenet of being liked is this: we often like what we are like. This can say who we really are, or what we aspire to be.

But studies have shown that superficial similarities have little effect and don't create a connection or special vibe as much as internal similarities.

If you've ever wanted to be friends with someone because of the "vibe" they gave you, than you were attracted to someone who looks similar to you. The reason for this was highlighted in a study that included it in cognitive assessments - where we rely on one trait of a person and it tends to fill a gap. In general, we will often want to find people who are different from us to fill in what we are lacking, but we feel in tune and have more opportunities for growth from people who are more like us.

Basically, humans are still exploiting and experimenting from different things, but most of the time in our lives we find our own "tribe".

Keep calm

Have you heard the term “try hard” in your teens? Aside from trying to be cool in our teens, there's actually some scientific research that points to why we discourage or avoid excessive flattery from others.

While everyone likes a little praise, research shows that we like people who like us, because it takes a lot of effort to be worthy of that admiration. But sometimes this turns into flattery and makes others feel uncomfortable. When complimented, nice gestures can quickly become overwhelming, so try to stay calm - sober.